Chameleon Circuit - The Doctor Who Musical
by Katkee
Summary: I love musicals. The Chameleon Circuit songs sounded like one. I wrote the script. This is it. From An Awful Lot of Running to Still Not Ginger, this covers all their songs and quite a bit of the TV show. The Doctor is Dying now up!
1. An Awful Lot of Running to Do

This isn't really a normal fanfic, so, an introduction.

I love musicals, and I love Doctor Who. I was listening to Chameleon Circuit and thought, "This would be a great musical." Four days and a whole lot of typing later, this resulted. It's the musical version of Doctor Who, using the Chameleon Circuit songs and dialogue that's mostly copied from the show. All that's mine is the stage directions and who's saying what. Plus, I edited a few words of both Cham. Circuit and the TV dialogue, and I added a fairly terrible Finale song by editing together a few of the other songs.

If you read this, PLEASE listen to Chameleon Circuit at the same time, because it will be fantastic. Hopefully.

I don't own either Chameleon Circuit or Doctor Who, but I so wish I did. Now I've written it, I want to see this show so bad.

Thanks for reading, and enjoy!

* * *

**ACT I**

**Scene 1**

_Curtain raises. Stage is dark._

NARRATOR: _(voiceover)_ He's like fire and ice and rage. He's like the night and the storm in the heart of the sun. He's ancient and forever. He burns at the centre of time and can see the turn of the universe. And he's wonderful.

_Lights come up. The TARDIS is in the centre of the stage. ROSE enters from upstage left, MARTHA from upstage right, DONNA from downstage left._

ROSE:

He is like fire, burning through time. As old as forever, but fast in his prime.

_JACK enters from upstage right, AMY from downstage left, RORY from downstage right._

MARTHA:

I saw his blue spaceship materialize. He looked out and said to me-

ALL:

Run for your life!

AMY:

I don't know why I never thought to ask him for his name.

DONNA:

I really don't think he'd have told me the truth anyway.

But that's okay…

ROSE:

It's completely terrifying…

JACK:

But it's so, so exciting!

MARTHA:

He said I was brilliant and I could change the world.

AMY and RORY:

So many places I've been, there's so much more to see.

We've got galaxies and planets and moons…

ALL:

And an awful lot of running to do!

_They move closer to the TARDIS._

JACK:

As a full-time companion, he gave me a key-

ROSE:

And a phone with a signal in every galaxy.

DONNA:

As we fell through the Vortex, I felt so free.

Please don't let this danger just be another dream.

ROSE, MARTHA, DONNA, AMY:

'Cause my life before you was unreasonably mundane.

Never been happier, although I face death every day.

I wouldn't have it any other way!

RORY:

It's completely terrifying-

AMY:

But it's so, so exciting!

DONNA:

He said I was brilliant and I could change the world.

JACK:

So many places I've been, there's so much more to see.

We've got galaxies and planets and moons…

ALL:

And an awful lot of running to do!

_The TARDIS door opens. The NINTH DOCTOR, the TENTH DOCTOR, and the ELEVENTH DOCTOR step out. Everyone clusters around them, in front of the TARDIS. _

DONNA:

And you know you could fix that Chameleon Circuit if you just try hot-wiring the fragment links and superseding the binary- binary- binary- binary- binary- binary-

ROSE, MARTHA, DONNA, JACK, AMY, RORY:

It's completely terrifying, but it's so, so exciting.

He said I was brilliant and I could change the world.

So many places I've been, there's so much more to see.

We've got galaxies and planets and moons-

ALL:

And an awful lot of running to do!

_The NINTH DOCTOR takes ROSE's and JACK's hands. The TENTH DOCTOR takes MARTHA's and DONNA's hands. The ELEVENTH DOCTOR takes AMY's and RORY's hands. _

NINE, TEN, AND ELEVEN: Run!

_Everyone runs offstage in different directions. Blackout._


	2. Gallifreyan History 101

**Scene 2**

_The TENTH DOCTOR and MARTHA sit in the centre of the stage._

TEN: I'm not just a Time Lord. I'm the last of the Time Lords.

MARTHA: What happened?

TEN: There was a war. A Time War. The last Great Time War. My people fought a race called the Daleks, for the sake of all creation. And they lost. Everyone lost. They're all gone now. My family, my friends, even that sky. Oh, you should have seen it, that old planet…

_The lights fade out. When they rise, the set has changed. A whiteboard is in the back, a desk in front of it. Chairs in neat rows face the board, most of them filled. A teacher, a FANBOY wearing a Doctor Who shirt, stands at the front._

FANBOY: All right, class, I'm the Professor. I'm going to be giving you your lecture today. Now, just so that we're all clear, this is Gallifreyan History 101, so please make sure you're in the right class.

_One of the students stands and runs off stage right._

FANBOY: There's always one, isn't there? Right, for the rest of us, we've got a lot to cover, so let's get started.

_(As he sings, images of what he says are projected on the board behind him.)_

At first we were just Gallifreyans and that was fine,

Just taking up space, biding our time.

'Til Rassilon came along

With his ever-present sense of right and wrong.

He was strong, he was mighty

He was the founder of Time Lord society.

Now this is the subject that everyone finds the hardest.  
But you're gonna have to pass it if you want to earn your TARDIS.  
Nobody's graduating from this Academy  
Until you've all mastered Gallifreyan History.  
Gallifreyan History.

Now Rassilon had a buddy called Omega;  
His interstellar science would amaze ya.  
He found our source of power  
And devised a cunning plan in under an hour.  
It went sour, he was erased.  
But at least now we could travel through time and space.

Now if there's a subject that's impossible, it's this.  
In comparison, the Untempered Schism's a piece of piss.  
Nobody's graduating from this Academy  
Until you've all mastered Gallifreyan History.  
Gallifreyan History.

So now we're all Time Lords, and that's just fine.  
We're travelling through space, bouncing through time.  
But we've made it clear not to interfere,  
And that's a rule to which we all must adhere.  
But I fear that the Doc  
Is about causing havoc in his big blue box.

Now that brings up to date and everything's just gravy.  
I just hope it doesn't get messed up by Russell T Davies.  
Nobody's graduating from this Academy  
Until you've all mastered Gallifreyan...  
Until you can say you're Gallifreyan...  
Until you know all about Gallifreyan History.

Right, same time next week.

_Students leave, laughing and talking._


	3. Count the Shadows

**Scene 3**

_Inside the TARDIS. TEN and DONNA stand in front of the console. TEN is holding a book._

TEN: People never stop reading them. Agatha Christie is the best selling novelist of all time.

DONNA: But she never knew.

TEN: Well, no one knows how they're going to be remembered. All we can do is hope for the best. Maybe that's what kept her writing. Same thing keeps me travelling. Onwards?

DONNA: Onwards.

_TEN startles suddenly and pulls out his psychic paper._

TEN: _(reading aloud to himself)_ The library, come as soon as you can. x. X? _(he shrugs)_ Allons-y!

_He flips a few switches on the TARDIS console. It makes its dematerializing noise. Lights fade._

**Scene 4**

_Lights come up. RIVER SONG stands in the centre of the stage. MISS EVANGELISTA, ANITA, DAVE, and OTHER DAVE stand at various points around the stage._

RIVER: Where is he?

DAVE: Who?

_River doesn't respond._

RIVER: _(watching the shadows carefully)_

The day is almost over, and the sunlight is going

And the people walk in shadows, completely unknowing

That there's something lethal in the air that they can't see

Now a Time Lord can save me just by turning on a light

Although I don't think that the Doctor's gonna show up tonight

So I'm trying to remember what the Library said to me…

Gotta focus on all the silhouettes that you can see

Cause if the number keeps on changing then you're no use to me.

_TEN and DONNA run in from stage right. _

RIVER: You're late!

TEN: What?

Count the shadows

Count the shadows

Cause they're edging toward you like a hungry moth to a flame.

_MISS EVANGELISTA steps into a shadow at the edge of the stage. She immediately crumples to the ground._

TEN: _(grabs Donna's arm as she tries to help)_

So count the shadows

Count the shadows

Cause if you've got more than one then you're the victim that they will claim.

RIVER:

In the Library the darkness is waiting to attack

TEN:

And most of you explorers are never going back

Like Miss Evangelista-

RIVER:

Anita and two guys called Dave.

TEN:

And the shadows made four thousand other people disappear

And they've been hungry and waiting for a whole damn year

For some fresh meat that isn't gonna register as saved…

_He points at the ground behind Dave. He has two shadows._

TEN:

Gotta focus on all the silhouettes that you can see-

RIVER:

Cause if the number keeps on changing then you're no use to me.

_The light starts to focus on the centre of the stage, dimming the outskirts. Dave falls to the ground._

TEN:

So count the shadows

Count the shadows

Cause they're edging toward you like a hungry moth to a flame

So count the shadows

Count the shadows

Cause if you've got more than one then you're the victim that they will claim.

OTHER DAVE: Hey, who turned out the lights? Hey, who turned out the lights?

DONNA:

An invisible, carnivorous, aggressive armada-

TEN:

And they go by the name of the Vashta Nerada.

A thousand thousand million piranhas in the air

And the tingle on your skin that you feel in the dark

May be the hungry ones who contemplate leaving a mark

So when you're reaching for your light switch make sure you're prepared.

RIVER:

Gotta focus on all the silhouettes that you can see

Cause if the number keeps on changing then you're no use to me.

_Anita has two shadows and collapses. Other Dave staggers after Ten for a moment but finally collapses too. All other lights go off as a spotlight focuses on Ten, Donna, and River, standing in the middle._

ALL:

So count the shadows

Count the shadows

Cause they're edging toward you like a hungry moth to a flame

So count the shadows

Count the shadows

Cause if you've got more than one then you're the victim that they will claim-

_River connects two wires. The lights come back and she dies._

TEN: No!

_He bends down next to her and pulls out a sonic screwdriver. _

DONNA: Why would you give her your sonic screwdriver?

TEN: _(shrugging)_ I don't know. I… _(He realises something) _Oh!

_He runs offstage. Donna follows. Fade to black._


	4. Shipwrecked

**Scene 5**

_Inside the TARDIS. The TENTH DOCTOR, ROSE, and MICKEY. Mickey is holding down a button on the console._

TEN: Oh, it was on this, er, this planet thing. Asteroid. It's a long story, you had to be there. Er, what're you doing that for?

MICKEY: Because you told me to.

TEN: When was that?

MICKEY: About half an hour ago.

TEN: Er, you can let go now.

MICKEY: _(releasing the button)_ Well, how long's it been since I could've stopped?

TEN: Ten minutes? Twenty? Twenty-nine?

MICKEY: You just forgot me!

TEN: No, no, no, I was just, I was, I was calibrating. I was just. No, I know exactly what I'm doing.

_There is a loud bang. The room shakes and the lights flash. _

TEN: We've crashed! The time vortex – it's just gone!

_Momentary blackout. When the lights come back up, they've stepped outside the TARDIS and are in a parallel version of London. The exterior of the TARDIS is in centre stage._

TEN: What?

I believe everything happens for a reason.

Why did we end up here?

Chronarch's dead, nothing left, all seems so confusing.

Vortex can't just disappear.

ROSE:

What happens when all the lights go out?

TEN:

There's no way back

We're stranded now.

MICKEY:

What happens when everything goes dark?

TEN:

It's got no life

Left in its heart.

I'm sorry, I'm so sorry

Seems I'm not that clever after all.

Now my race are erased, nothing but the memories

Folktales told through time

Legacy meant to be buried with the Yale key

And my remaining lives

What happens when all the lights go out?

There's no way back

We're stranded now.

What happens when everything goes dark?

It's got no life

Left in its heart.

I'm sorry, I'm so sorry

Seems I'm not that clever after all.

_He reaches into the TARDIS and pulls out a small, glowing green bulb. _

TEN:

A green glimmer of hope, we can't let it go to waste.

_He blows on it._

TEN:

If I give some of my life force, we'll use it to escape this place.

_Rose and Mickey leave in opposite directions._

TEN:

Where are they running off to now? I thought that they would care

Try to keep them safe, they don't know what lies out there.

_He sits down tiredly, leaning back against the TARDIS._

TEN:

I'm getting old and I can't carry on.

I'm getting old and I can't carry on.

I'm getting old and I can't carry on.

I'm getting old and I can't carry on.

_ROSE and MICKEY run back onstage, chased by the CYBERMEN. TEN leaps to his feet. The Cybermen surround Rose, Mickey, and Ten, pushing them toward the centre of the stage._

CYBERMEN: DELETE. DELETE.

_Ten pulls out his sonic screwdriver. Blackout._


	5. Type 40

**Scene 6**

_The TARDIS, SEXY, is in a cage in centre stage, surrounded by piles of mechanical junk. ELEVEN stands in front of the cage. _

SEXY: Ah, it's my thief.

ELEVEN: Who are you?

SEXY: It's about time.

ELEVEN: I don't understand. Who are you?

SEXY: Do you not know me? Just because they put me in here?

Powered by the Eye of Harmony,

I can travel anywhere in space and time

I'm linked to you symbiotically,

Got your imprint on my Briode Nebuliser

There used to be 305 of me

But the rest were decommissioned and replaced

Takes six pilots to fly me properly

Only happened once at the Medusa Cascade.

ELEVEN: You're the TARDIS? But how-

SEXY: TARDIS! That's me.

The last Type 40 in the universe

But there's still so much to see

But I'll be going on adventures

As long as there's huon energy.

My chameleon circuit hasn't worked since 1963,

But you just won't give up on me.

My interior's in a state of temporal grace,

Though on occasion that gets circumvented.

Inside me there's an awful lot of space

Because I'm dimensionally transcendental

I've withstood falling down for miles and miles,

Suffered 3000 degree heat without scorching

Hit by the Titanic when I was in mid-flight

Every time you're sure to fix me.

_Eleven uses his sonic screwdriver to open the cage. Sexy steps out. AMY and RORY come rushing in._

AMY: Doctor, who's she?

ELEVEN: My TARDIS!

The last type 40 in the universe

But there's still so much to see

And she'll be going on adventures

As long as there's huon energy.

Her chameleon circuit hasn't worked since 1963-

SEXY:

But the Doctor won't give up on me!

AMY: _(sceptical) _Did you wish _really_ hard?

ELEVEN: Let's get you your body back.

SEXY:

The last type 40 in the universe

But there's still so much to see

But I'll be going on adventures

As long as there's huon energy

My chameleon circuit hasn't worked since 1963

But you just won't give up on me…

_She starts to glow._

SEXY: This body won't last much longer.

ELEVEN: You can't go!

SEXY: I never got to say… Hello, Doctor. It's so very, very nice to meet you.

ELEVEN and SEXY:

The last type 40 in the universe

But there's still so much to see

But I'll be going on adventures

As long as there's huon energy

[My/Your] chameleon circuit hasn't worked since 1963-

SEXY

But you'll never give up on me.

_She throws her arms out to the sides, regeneration-style, then collapses. Blackout._

* * *

Please review if you like this, or especially if there are any improvements I could make. Or if you're a musical producer/director and you want to make this musical a reality! (Because that's so likely to happen.)

Thank you to everyone who is actually reading this. Plus, it gets better! Act 2 (Still Got Legs) is my favorite.


	6. Blink

**Scene 7**

_Lights up. Old furniture decorates the room. TEN and MARTHA run in. WEEPING ANGELS follow, freezing when Ten or Martha looks at them. They stop in the centre of the room._

TEN: Don't blink. Look at all of them and don't blink.

_Ten and Martha stand back-to-back, trying not to take their eyes off any of the Angels. The Weeping Angels move in staggering motions and eventually close in on them. Martha screams and they disappear. The Angels move to the edges of the stage and freeze. SALLY and KATHY enter. Kathy touches an Angel and disappears. Someone offstage hands Sally a letter. Music starts as Sally opens the letter._

KATHY (offstage):

Sally Sparrow, I wrote you a letter

To make you feel better

'Bout the fact that I'm gone.

I may be stuck in the past

But my future is vast

Don't go looking for me, girl

You've got to go on.

_A FANBOY and a FANGIRL enter stage left. LARRY NIGHTINGALE enters stage right. An image of Ten is projected on the back wall._

LARRY:

Don't think he's talking to you

He's just on the TV

FANBOY:

Well, look past the Easter egg

And see the reality

A world of time and space inside a funny blue box-

_The TARDIS is moved onstage. The Angels start to move toward it. Sally tugs on the door to no avail._

FANGIRL:

The Angels are approaching

And the front door is locked-

_Sally and Larry stare hard at the Angels._

FANBOY, FANGIRL, and TEN (offstage):

So don't blink.

I said don't blink.

TEN (offstage):

Just look directly at them and they'll stay where they are.

LARRY:

I think they're crying anyway,

They can't mean no harm.

My eyes are watering, I'm right on the brink.

I'm sure nothing would happen if I were to-

FANGIRL:

The Doctor isn't here this time,

This won't be a breeze.

FANBOY:

He's stuck in 1969 on your DVDs.

Just listen very carefully

To what he's got to say.

FANBOY, FANGIRL, and TEN (offstage):

Do not turn your back on them

And don't look away.

TEN (offstage):

'Cause if they get inside the TARDIS

Then the sun will go out.

_The Angels continue to move closer, a little bit at a time._

FANBOY:

Just go down to the cellar and show them what you're about.

TEN (offstage):

They move faster than you could ever believe,

Don't let the light go out and don't be naïve.

_The lights start to flicker and the Angels move closer each time._

FANBOY, FANGIRL, and TEN (offstage):

Just don't blink.

I said don't blink.

Just look directly at them and they'll stay where they are.

SALLY:

I think they're crying anyway, they can't mean no harm.

_She manages to get the key in the TARDIS door as the Angels are about to attack. _

SALLY:

My eyes are watering, I'm right on the brink.

I'm sure nothing would happen if I were to-

_The TARDIS disappears and the Angels are stuck looking at each other. Carefully avoiding them, Larry and Sally make their way offstage. Blackout._

_Lights come back up on an empty stage, apart from the fanboy and fangirl._

FANBOY and FANGIRL:

The future's coming quickly

So please don't be scared.

The answers will find you…

_Sally walks onstage, carrying a folder._

FANBOY and FANGIRL:

Just make sure you're prepared.

When you see the Doctor

Then you'll work out the link.

_Ten and Martha walk onstage, Ten carrying a bow. Sally runs up to them._

SALLY: My God, it's you. It really is you. Oh, you don't remember me, do you?

TEN: Look, sorry, I've got a bit of a complex life. Things don't always happen to me in quite the right order.

SALLY: Oh my God, of course, it hasn't happened to you yet. Okay, listen. One day, you're going to get stuck in 1969. Make sure you've got this with you.

_She hands her folder to Ten, who glances at it and nods. Ten and Martha exit stage left, Sally exits stage right._

FANBOY and FANGIRL:

But even though it's ended

Please be sure not to blink…

_Blackout._


	7. Exterminate, Regenerate

Note: This song (Exterminate, Regenerate) has two different interpretations - either it's about the Daleks, or the Master. I went for the first interpretation. I'll write the other version, though, if enough people are interested. Let me know if you are!

Also, I'm doing the songs in order, starting with the first CD. I update consistently, though, so keep checking back to see if your favorite song is up yet.

* * *

**Scene 8**

_Lights up. A DALEK is chained, centre stage. The NINTH DOCTOR stands in front of it._

DALEK: You are an enemy of the Daleks! You must be destroyed!

_Its gun moves. Nothing happens._

NINE: _(laughing)_ It's not working. Fantastic! Look at you. The great space dustbin.

DALEK: Keep back!

_Nine moves forward a step._

NINE: What for? What're you going to do to me? If you can't kill, then what are you good for, Dalek? What's the point of you? You're nothing.

_From stage left, the TENTH DOCTOR runs in, followed by a HUMAN DALEK, Dalek Sek._

TEN: A new form of Dalek.

DALEK SEK: I am Dalek in human form.

TEN: What does it feel like?

DALEK SEK: I feel humanity. Everything we wanted from humanity – ambition, hatred, aggression, war.

TEN: That's not what humanity means.

DALEK SEK: I think it does.

_From stage right, a DALEK enters, carrying a tray of tea. The ELEVENTH DOCTOR follows. _

DALEK 2: Would you care for some tea?

ELEVEN: _(knocking the tray to the ground)_ Stop this! What are you doing here? What do you want?

DALEK 2: We seek only to help you.

ELEVEN: To do what?

DALEK 2: To win the war.

ELEVEN: What war? This war, against the Nazis, or your war? The war against the rest of the universe, the war against all life forms that are not Dalek?

DALEK 2: I do not understand. I am your soldier.

NINE, TEN, and ELEVEN: I am the Doctor. And you are the Daleks.

NINE:

It's been such a long time since I met you back on Skaro.

TEN:

And I'm pretty sure that you know-

ELEVEN:

That not much has changed since then.

NINE:

It doesn't matter how hard you try to remove me,

TEN:

I think you will agree-

ELEVEN:

That if one of us dies, then the other will too.

NINE, TEN, and ELEVEN:

I am locked in war with you.

DALEKS:

EXTERMINATE, REGENERATE.

I thought you always knew our fate.

TEN:

To just keep fighting on and on,

While time keeps turning.

ELEVEN:

Regenerate, exterminate

And even though we are the same

NINE:

Why don't you hop into your ship

And leave me burning

_More Daleks come onstage from all directions. Nine, Ten, and Eleven pull out various weapons and start to fight them._

DALEK SEK:

Even though as men we have our contrasts,

We're of exactly the same class

ALL:

And our constant companion is death!

DALEK:

Look at you, fashioning people into weapons.

ALL DALEKS:

How can you say that you're better than me?

We both carry the fire that is set to devour life.

Exterminate, regenerate

NINE:

I thought you always knew our fate

To just keep fighting on and on.

NINE, TEN, and ELEVEN:

While time keeps turning.

Regenerate, exterminate.

ELEVEN:

And even though we are the same

Why don't you hop into your ship

And leave me burning

_They continue fighting each other. Daleks die. Occasionally one of the Doctors dies but gets back up and keeps fighting._

TEN and DALEK SEK:

We both carry the fire that has the power to end life

TEN:

But what I do with that flame is what separates our types.

If it takes to the end of reality to beat you-

NINE, TEN, and ELEVEN:

Then I'll be sure to meet you at the exit of the world.

ELEVEN:

Exterminate, regenerate

You know that it isn't too late

To end what seems impossible

NINE:

And leave time turning.

Regenerate, exterminate-

TEN:

And even though we aren't the same,

Why don't you hop into my ship

NINE, TEN, and ELEVEN:

And we can settle this-

DALEKS:

And we can settle this?

DALEK SEK:

Exterminate, regenerate

You know that it isn't too late

To end what seems impossible

And leave time turning

Regenerate, exterminate

And even though we aren't the same

Why don't you hop into my ship

NINE:

Exterminate, regenerate

TEN:

I thought you always knew our fate

ELEVEN:

To just keep fighting on and on.

NINE, TEN, and ELEVEN:

While time keeps turning.

DALEK 1:

Regenerate, exterminate

DALEK 2:

And even though we are the same

DALEK 3:

Why don't you hop into your ship

TEN:

And leave me burning-

_He gets shot by a Dalek and falls to the ground. After a moment he stands back up. The META-CRISIS DOCTOR runs out stage right._

META-CRISIS DOCTOR:

And we can settle this, forever.

DALEK SEK:

Yeah, we can travel time together

META-CRISIS DOCTOR:

_(pushes a button. The Daleks all die at once.)_

We can settle this, forever.

_All the Doctors run offstage in different directions. Blackout._


	8. K9's Lament

**Scene 9**

_Lights up. At a table in the centre of the stage the TENTH DOCTOR is fixing K9. SARA JANE SMITH, ROSE, and MICKEY watch. K9 suddenly comes back to life._

K9: Master?

TEN: He's back! Rose, give me the oil.

_He puts a sample of the oil on K9's probe._

K9: Confirmation of analysis. Substance is Krillitane oil.

TEN: They're doing something to the children. We have to stop them. Allons-y!

_He puts K9 on the floor and runs off. Before he can get offstage, a KRILLITANE comes out. Ten, Sara Jane, Rose, and Mickey run from it and try to fight it._

K9:

I knew a man that I will never forget.

But nobody ever remembers the pet.

He took me from the year 5000 on a lonely asteroid.

He said he was looking for a droid.

He was my master, his attention I did crave.

To him, I was nothing more than a slave.

We saved creatures all across the galaxy

But nobody ever thought to save me.

And I wonder what life would be like if  
I could choose not to say affirmative  
People tell me what to do and I just roll along  
But inside my metal head I'm singing my song

Treacherous compliance, what have you done to me?  
I'm a fraction of the shadow of the K-9 I could be  
I see other dogs in the park fetching sticks and digging bones  
Never has a tin dog ever felt so alone  
Oh no

He gave me to Sarah Jane as a gift  
But I wasn't consulted, I was a little miffed  
Is this what I'm reduced to, a casual memento?  
I've seen all of creation, but to it I'm incidental  
But there's more to this automaton than they will ever know  
I'm more than just alloys and circuits, I have soul  
And I've got dreams just like everybody else  
I could conquer the world if I could conquer myself

And I wonder what life would be like if  
I could choose not to say affirmitive  
People tell me what to do and I just roll along  
But inside my metal head I'm singing my song

Treacherous compliance, what have you done to me?  
I'm a fraction of the shadow of the K-9 I could be  
I see other dogs in the park fetching sticks and digging bones  
Never has a tin dog ever felt so alone  
Oh no

And I wonder what life would be like if  
I could choose not to say affirmitive  
People tell me what to do and I just roll along  
But inside my metal head I'm singing my song

Treacherous compliance, what have you done to me?  
I'm a fraction of the shadow of the K-9 I should be  
I see other dogs in the park, they're fetching sticks and digging bones  
Never has a tin dog ever felt so alone  
Oh no

_Ten, Sara Jane, Rose, and Mickey run offstage. The Krillitane approach K9. He fires a laser blast at a barrel of oil nearby. Blackout._

* * *

I know, this scene was really short and pretty terrible. Mostly because I really don't like this song, and there wasn't much I could think of to do with it. So, two chapters today!


	9. Journey's End

**Scene 10**

_Lights up. DONNA lies on the ground, centre stage. ROSE runs up to her._

ROSE: Tell him this. Two words.

_She whispers into Donna's ear, then runs off stage right. Momentary blackout. When the lights come back up, the TENTH DOCTOR stands over Donna. Donna sits up._

DONNA: What happened?

TEN: You were in a parallel universe, one that never happened now.

DONNA: There was a woman, a blonde woman. _(confused)_ She told me about you.

TEN: _(worried) _What was her name?

DONNA: I don't know, but she said… she said the stars were going out. She told me to warn you… two words. Bad wolf.

_Ten is shocked. He jumps to his feet and pulls Donna up._

TEN: Let's go!

_They run offstage. Blackout._

**Scene 11**

_Lights up. ROSE, MARTHA, SARA JANE, JACK, and HARRIET JONES are scattered around stage left. The TARDIS is parked up right. A case with a hand in it is in front of the TARDIS. The DALEKS and DAVROS are upstage centre, with a console behind them. A FANBOY is downstage right and a FANGIRL is downstage left. _

FANGIRL:

Something was wrong when the stars went out

Didn't know what it was all about.

Then the bees started to fly away

And Earth got trapped in the Medusa Cascade.

_(Rose, Martha, Sara Jane, Jack, and Harriet point at the sky.)_

FANBOY:

Through the subwave network everybody had a chat.

_(Martha, Sara Jane, Jack, and Harriet mime speaking. Rose watches.)_

FANBOY:

Harriet was murdered and then everyone was sad.

_(A Dalek approaches them and shoots Harriet, who dies.)_

FANGIRL: Awww…

FANBOY:

Davros stole the signal and the Doctor was amazed

How was he alive and who had brought him to this place?

_(TEN and DONNA leave the TARDIS. Rose spots them and starts to run toward them.)_

FANGIRL:

Spotted Rose Tyler across the fog

_(Ten sees Rose and starts to run toward her. A Dalek moves toward them.)_

FANGIRL:

Heard-

DALEK:

EXTERMINATE!

_(The Dalek shoots Ten, who falls.)_

FANGIRL:

Then he was shot.

Started glowing with a golden shine.

_(Ten starts to regenerate but redirects his energy into the hand.)_

FANGIRL:

Transferred his energy, then he was fine.

_Everyone except the Fangirl and Fanboy freezes._

FANBOY and FANGIRL:

He was pretty lucky that he kept his severed hand,

Though in terms of canon I do not quite understand.

What was Russell thinking, what the hell was going on?

_(quieter)_ Okay, fine, we're sorry, we'll get right back to the song.

We've reached the Journey's End

Having a laugh inside the TARDIS.

Though it didn't make much sense

Always nice to see them Daleks.

_Martha puts on a teleport vest and pulls out the Osterhagen Key. Jack takes off his warp star necklace. Mickey enters stage left._

FANBOY:

Martha Jones teleports it to Germany,

Where she prepares to use the Osterhagen Key.

Jack had a necklace thing, a Warp Star, so I'm told

But Davros was like no, come hang in my vault.

_Rose, Martha, Jack, Sara Jane, Mickey, and Ten head to centre stage. The Daleks move to reveal Davros. Donna steps into the TARDIS and takes the hand with her._

FANGIRL:

Threw the TARDIS-

FANBOY:_ (overlapping) _Threw the TARDIS?

FANGIRL:

Into the fire.

FANBOY: _(overlapping) _Into the fire!

FANGIRL:

Donna thought that things were looking dire.

_Donna and the META-CRISIS DOCTOR step out of the TARDIS and join the others in front of Davros._

FANBOY:

Second Doctor-

FANGIRL: There were two of them!

FANBOY:

Grew from energy.

FANGIRL: That doesn't sound plausible.

FANBOY:

Captain Jack started having fantasies.

FANGIRL:

Caan went to the Time War and it muddled up his brain.

Now he sees the future but he's totally insane.

Silly, silly Davros thinks that Caan is on his side.

Wait 'til he discovers that the prophecy's a lie…

FANBOY:

Davros revealed his master plan.

If you need a reality bomb, he's your man.

_Donna runs to the console and flips a few switches. The Daleks start to spin._

FANBOY:

Donna flicked a switch and said some complex words.

_The Meta-crisis Doctor goes to the console and hits a button. The Daleks explode._

FANBOY:

Daleks exploded and they saved the Earth.

_They all move downstage. Ten puts his hands on Donna's temples._

FANGIRL:

One last thing before we finish, Donna's mind was wiped.

Doctor had to leave, if she remembered she would die.

Sara Jane returned to Mr Smith, K9, and Luke.

Didn't mention Mickey 'cause he's really not much use.

FANBOY: _(regretfully)_ Sorry.

ALL:

We've reached the journey's end,

Having a laugh inside the TARDIS.

FANBOY and FANGIRL:

Though it didn't make much sense,

Always nice to see them Daleks.

_Rose, Mickey, Sara Jane, Jack, Meta-crisis Doctor, Martha, and Donna start heading offstage in different directions. Ten stands centre stage._

FANBOY and FANGIRL:

We've reached the journey's end,

Having a laugh inside the TARDIS.

Though it didn't make much sense,

Always nice to see them Daleks- them Daleks- them Daleks- them Daleks-

_Ten goes into the TARDIS. The dematerialization sound plays. Curtain falls._


	10. Regenerate Me

I skipped Friends of the Ood, I know. It didn't seem to fit with any of the rest of it. So, Act 2!

* * *

**ACT II**

_Entr'acte: The Subwave Signal_

**Scene 1**

_Lights up. The NINTH DOCTOR, the TENTH DOCTOR, and the ELEVENTH DOCTOR stand in the centre of the stage. _

NINE:

Vigilante of time and space,

Evil knows you can't defeat me.

TEN:

You can fight, and you may shoot me.

But you can't exterminate me!

ALL:

Regenerate me!

Regenerate me…

ELEVEN:

Lonely saviour of the universe,

Last in line of all my kin.

NINE:

King of sacrifice and bearer of justice-

TEN:

I am your last chance to repent!

_Daleks come out from all directions. The Doctors all pull out weapons and defeat them._

NINE and TEN:

[Nine/Ten] personas, I walk the Earth.

NINE:

Sole protector of the human race.

ELEVEN:

You will know me by the big blue box.

ALL:

But you may never know my face!

Regenerate me!

Regenerate me

Regenerate me

Regenerate me…

_Blackout._

* * *

Super short, so again two chapters today. And the next scene is my favorite!


	11. Nightmares and Travelling Man

**Scene 2**

_Lights up. TEN and ELEVEN stand in the centre of the stage. An OOD comes out. _

OOD: This is what we have seen, Doctor. The darkness heralds only one thing – the end of time itself.

_Ten looks shaken and miserable._

ELEVEN:

_(placing his hand on Ten's back) _Hey old man, rest your head. You're breaking down inside.

Armour's cracked, set to collapse. Damn you, don't you cry!

TEN:

I've ended lives and ended worlds, I guess I've done it all.

Fire and ice and rage inside, _(he turns to Eleven)_ how long 'til I fall?

Somewhere all my darkest fears are gathering.

It's not enough to save the day, I can't escape my nightmares.

_One by one throughout the next lines, enemies start to come out, around the edges of the stage. Daleks, Cybermen, Ood, Silents, Weeping Angels, Krillitanes, etc._

TEN:

Dreams have shown me who I am, a danger to myself.

ELEVEN:

Trickster, feared, far from revered, so I must fear as well.

TEN:

Words and laughter's wearing thin, breaking this disguise.

ELEVEN:

Where do Angels fear to tread? How can I think to hide?

Somewhere all my darkest fears are gathering.

It's not enough to save the day, I can't escape my nightmares.

_Spotlight on the MASTER, coming out from stage left. He smiles. All the enemies slowly start to converge on Ten and Eleven, stopping only a couple metres away._

TEN and ELEVEN:

_(glancing around at their enemies warily)_ Somewhere all my darkest fears are gathering.

It's not enough to save the day, I can't escape my nightmares-

_Ten and Eleven turn and run in opposite directions offstage, Ten right, Eleven left. The enemies pursue them. Momentary blackout. _

_Lights up. ROSE, MARTHA, and DONNA push Ten back onstage from the right. NINE follows. At the same time, RIVER and AMY push Eleven onstage from the left. Nine, Ten, and Eleven stand in the centre, the others at various points around the stage._

AMY:

Travelling man, such secrets to be told.

Alien man, running from the days of old.

RIVER:

Out of his world, with nothing left to lose.

Travelling man, coming down to rescue you.

DONNA:

You're hard to find, Time Lord.

Too busy saving everything to stop.

ROSE, MARTHA, DONNA, AMY, RIVER:

The travelling man will save the day.

The travelling man will keep you safe.

Even if he has to die 507 times,

The travelling man will save the day.

MARTHA:

Waiting so long for something to reprove.

Gallifrey man, all this tragic history.

AMY:

Such a sharp mind, but broken are his hearts.

Engines in gear, time to put things in the past.

ROSE:

There comes a time, Time Lord

When every boy must learn how to dance…

ROSE, MARTHA, DONNA, AMY, RIVER:

The travelling man will save the day

The travelling man will keep you safe.

Even if he has to die 507 times,

The travelling man will save the day.

RIVER:

Everybody knows that everybody dies, but nobody knows it like him.

I think all the lights would drain out of the skies, if he ever gave up trying.

NINE: Just this once-

NINE, TEN, ELEVEN: Everybody lives!

ALL:

The travelling man will save the day.

The travelling man will keep you safe.

Even if he has to die 507 times,

The travelling man will save the day.

_Blackout._


	12. Everything is Ending

**Scene 3**

AMY (voiceover): I want to go home.

ELEVEN (voiceover): _(disappointed)_ Okay.

AMY (voiceover): No, not like that. I just want to show you something. You're running from River. I'm running too.

_TARDIS materialization sound. Lights up. Amy's bedroom, with a wedding dress hanging from the wardrobe. The TARDIS is parked stage right. The crack on the wall is glowing faintly. AMY and ELEVEN step out of the TARDIS._

AMY:

_(pointing at the dress) _I'm getting married in the morning.

I took off my engagement ring.

It was the night before my wedding,

That was the night we started running.

ELEVEN:

Why would you need comforting?

AMY:

I nearly died, alone in the dark,

I couldn't open my eyes and it made me think

About what I want

About _who _I want…

_She pushes Eleven onto the bed._

AMY:

Everything is ending,

I can't believe I didn't see it sooner.

I know that this is what I need to do,

Even though you haven't got a clue.

Everything is changing,

I have to keep you by my side tonight.

And this must be why you found me,

Why you found me.

_She leans over Eleven on the bed, trying to kiss him. He sits up quickly and turns away._

ELEVEN:

You're not scared of anything,

You know I'm an alien.

You have so many empty rooms.

You really ought to get that seen to.

Why would you need comforting?

AMY:

I nearly died, alone in the dark.

I couldn't open my eyes, and it made me think

About what I want, about who I want

ELEVEN:

_(simultaneously) _This will be too hard,

Why can't you open your eyes?

I'll think about how to stop this from going on,

'Cause your life doesn't make any sense.

_He stands, ignoring Amy, and starts to pace back and forth._

ELEVEN:

Everything is ending,

I can't believe I didn't see it sooner.

I know that this is what I need to do,

Even though you haven't got a clue

Everything is changing

I have to keep you by my side tonight

And this must be

Why you found me, why you found me.

_He goes to the crack in the wall, running his hand along it. Amy pulls him away and pushes him against the TARDIS._

ELEVEN:

You're getting married in the morning!

AMY:

That's a long time away.

ELEVEN:

You're human, you're Amy!

AMY:

This is my fairy tale.

ELEVEN:

Listen to me!

ELEVEN and AMY:

[I'm/You're] 907.

ELEVEN:

Don't you know what that means?

AMY:

Doctor, you're sweet.

ELEVEN: _(looking at the crack)_ The crack in your wall, everything, Amy… it's about you!

AMY: _(whispering)_ Hold that thought.

ELEVEN and AMY:

Everything is ending,

I can't believe I didn't see it sooner.

I know that this is what I need to do,

Even though you haven't got a clue.

Everything is changing,

I have to keep you by my side tonight

And this must be

Why you found me, why you found me.

_Amy tries to kiss Eleven. He turns and goes into the TARDIS. She follows, annoyed. Blackout._


	13. Mr Pond

**Scene 4**

_Lights up. A huge fake cake is in the centre of the stage. RORY and others surround it, talking and laughing. ELEVEN suddenly pops out of the cake. Everyone falls silent._

ELEVEN: Rory! That's a relief. I thought I'd burst out of the wrong cake, again. Now then, Rory. We need to talk about your fiancée. She tried to kiss me. Tell you what, though. You're a lucky man. She's a great kisser. _(after a pause)_ Funny how you can say something in your head and it sounds fine.

RORY: What?

_Everyone else leaves. Eleven climbs out of the cake and it's taken offstage. AMY enters. _

ELEVEN: So! Let's go on an adventure, shall we?

_He and Amy run offstage and then back on, chased by a VAMPIRE. More follow. Rory stands downstage centre._

RORY:

_(glaring at Eleven)_ It's not the way she looks at you,

Like you're the first man in her life.

Because I know Amy's true,  
And when we're through she'll be my wife.  
I know you save the universe,  
She paints you in perfect light,  
Though I may be just a nurse,  
The Doctor isn't always right.

You've got no idea just how dangerous you make people to themselves.

Cause I want to be Mr Pond

And I can't lie and say that I'm fond

Of the way you've been hurled

Into our world

Now that you've saved the day

Why don't you fly away?

Cause I want to be Mr Pond

But there's so many things that could go wrong

In your time machine

That you just don't see.

Why can't she see?

_The vampires leave, but the DREAM LORD comes out. Eleven and Amy lay down and fall asleep._

RORY:

She's never said that she loves me,  
But she'll still risk her life for you,  
And in your company it seems to me  
That's all she'll do.  
Well I guess it's Amy's choice,  
And I know I can't overrule her,  
But I've hardly had a voice,  
And I don't want to lose her.

You've got no idea just how dangerous the world is when you're around.  
Cause I want to be Mr. Pond,  
And I can't lie and say that I'm fond  
Of the way you've been hurled into our world,  
Now that you've saved the day, why don't you fly away?  
Cause I want to be Mr. Pond,  
But there's so many things that could go wrong  
In your time machine that you just don't see.

Why can't you see what you're doing to Amy?  
If you keep putting her in danger, you're gonna get her killed!

_The Dream Lord leaves. Eleven and Amy wake up. Now Silurians come onstage, bearing guns. Amy and Eleven run from them._

RORY:

Cause I want to be Mr. Pond,  
And I can't lie and say that I'm fond  
Of the way you've been hurled into our world,  
Now that you've saved the day, why don't you fly away?  
Cause I want to be Mr. Pond,  
But there's so many things that could go wrong  
In your time machine that you just don't see.

_Rory gets shot by one of the Silurians. Amy screams and runs to him. Rory is lit by white light, and Eleven pulls her away. She looks at him. Rory disappears. Blackout._


	14. Kiss the Girl and Knock Four Times

**Scene 5**

_Lights up. A house is set up on the most of the stage. CRAIG is sitting on the couch. On the left, a wall and a door separates it from the rest of the stage. A FANBOY and FANGIRL stand at the edges of the stage. ELEVEN falls onstage, stage left, as if pushed. He gets up quickly and stares offstage._

ELEVEN: Amy? Amy!

_He turns to the house. An index card lies on the ground. He picks it up, reads it, and looks at the house in front of him. He shrugs and knocks. Craig opens the door and Eleven enters._

CRAIG:

Some people think the perfect fantasy's the girl next door,

But my dream girl has got the keys to my heart and home.

I never dreamed that in a million years that she'd settle for me.

_Eleven offers a paper bag to Craig and holds up the psychic paper._

CRAIG:

The room's to let, I only advertised this morning

But here you are with three months' rent and references that shine beyond belief

Take me to my room, you said.

No time to lose, you said.

_Eleven goes to the kitchen and messes around with a pan on the stove._

CRAIG:

And now you're making omelettes and you ask me

Who's that girl on the fridge?

And I'm telling my life story,

But I guess she's too good for me.

_SOPHIE enters._

CRAIG:

She's not my girlfriend,

She's just a friend who's a girl

She's my buddy, she's my best mate

She rocks my world

I want to tell her, but I just can't find the time

Or find the words-

FANBOY and FANGIRL:

Oh, for god's sake, kiss the girl!

CRAIG:

A quiet night in, but we won't even know you're here.

No phones, no interruptions,

Maybe now's my chance to tell her how I feel,

But now you're here and I can't think

So why not stay and have a drink?

SOPHIE: I don't mind if you don't mind.

CRAIG: Do you want to stay?

ELEVEN: I don't mind.

CRAIG: Great.

And now she's going to live with monkeys,

See the world and disappear

Am I what's keeping her here?

She's not my girlfriend,

She's just a friend who's a girl

She's my buddy, she's my best mate.

She rocks my world

I want to tell her, but I just can't find the time

Or find the words…

FANBOY and FANGIRL:

Oh, for God's sake, kiss the girl!

CRAIG:

I can't take this anymore.

I want you to go, cause you're talking to a cat

And everybody loves you, and you're better than me at football and my job,

And now Sophie's all monkeys, monkeys, monkeys…

You're gonna take her away from me!

ELEVEN:

All right, I didn't want to do this, but it might be the only way.

The world will end if you don't concentrate on why you want to stay

So Mr Sofa Man, what's keeping you here?

CRAIG:

Sophie!

I don't wanna leave.

Sophie!

I can't leave.

Sophie!

I love you, Sophie.

SOPHIE: I love you too, Craig!

CRAIG:

But what about the monkeys?

ELEVEN:

Oh, not again, not when the world's about to burn!

ELEVEN, FANGIRL, FANBOY:

Just for God's sake, kiss the girl!

_Craig and Sophie kiss. Blackout._

_As the set is cleared, an Ood comes out and stops, centre stage. Spotlight on him._

OOD:

It is returning through the dark.

Doctor, you have met your mark.

Your song is ending, so don't cry

When you hear him knock four times.

_Blackout again._


	15. Teenage Rebel

**Scene 6**

_Lights up. NINE and ROSE enter. _

NINE: Time Lords have this little trick, it's sort of a way of cheating death. Except it means I'm going to change, and I'm not going to see you again. Not like this.

ROSE: What's going on?

NINE: It's called regeneration. Rose, before I go, I just want to tell you, you were fantastic. Absolutely fantastic. And do you know what? So was I.

_TEN, JACK, and DONNA enter. Ten is dying. Rose goes over to them._

DONNA: What do we do? There has to be some medicine or something.

JACK: Just step back. Rose, just do as I say and step back. He's dying and you know what happens next.

TEN: It's starting.

DONNA: Will someone please tell me what is going on?

ROSE: When he's dying, his body, it repairs itself. But you can't!

TEN: I'm sorry, it's too late. I'm regenerating.

_ELEVEN and YOUNG AMELIA enter. _

AMELIA: Are you all right, mister?

ELEVEN: Early days. I'm fine.

AMELIA: Who are you?

ELEVEN: I don't know yet. I'm still cooking. But I can guess…

_Rose, Jack, Donna, and Amelia leave. _

NINE:

I've had so many different faces, so many different personalities.

ELEVEN:

My tastes change, I get cravings,

But some things you can't take away from me.

TEN:

You can't stop me dreaming!

I used to be old, but now I feel young

Cause I was a boy when I learnt how to run.

I could never be settled in one time or place.

NINE:

I won't ever stop, cause I know what's right.

Get in my way, I will burst into light.

ELEVEN:

I'll keep dying and living and changing my ways,

But I was a teenage rebel and that stayed the same.

TEN:

It might feel like you're defeated-

NINE:

But I know that we all long to be set free.

ELEVEN:

So overcome your monsters

Rise up, there is just one thing you need:

ALL:

Something to believe in…

ELEVEN:

I used to be old, but now I feel young.

TEN:

Cause I was a boy when I learnt how to run.

NINE:

I could never be settled in one time or place.

I won't ever stop-

TEN:

Cause I know what's right.

ELEVEN:

Get in my way, I will burst into light.

NINE:

I keep dying and living, changing my ways.

But I was a teenage rebel and that stayed the same.

ALL:

I used to be old, but now I feel young

Cause I was a boy when I learnt how to run

I could never be settled in one time or place.

I won't ever stop, cause I know what's right.

Get in my way, I will burst into light.

I keep dying and living, changing my ways.

But I was a teenage rebel and that stayed the same!

_Blackout._


	16. Big Bang Two

**Scene 7**

_Lights up. The Pandorica is upstage right. The TARDIS is downstage right. AMY and RORY sit on a bench downstage left. ELEVEN is dragged onstage by DALEKS, CYBERMEN, and AUTONS and into the Pandorica. The Daleks, Cybermen, and Autons leave. Rory shoots Amy, who leans into Rory. River opens the TARDIS door from inside._

RIVER: I'm sorry, my love.

_She closes the door and opens it again a moment later._

RIVER: I'm sorry, my love.

_A FANBOY and FANGIRL enter downstage left and downstage right. They stand at the edge of the stage._

FANGIRL:

The Doctor's stuck in the Pandorica,

Amy might be dead and Rory's a

Roman with a gun inside his hand…

Seems like things aren't going as planned.

FANBOY:

River's in the TARDIS,

The TARDIS is on fire

She's feeling the heat

On repeat, she'll require

Someone she can trust, someone with a bow tie

But he's been locked up and left to die.

FANBOY and FANGIRL:

Oh my God, what will they do?

Seems impossible to get through

My mind is blown, I bet yours is too

Well, I guess this is Doctor Who.

_Rory puts his head in his hands._

FANGIRL:

Rory's quite distressed and he starts to sob

When the Doctor appears with a mop-

_Eleven runs on stage left, holding a mop and wearing a fez. He hands Rory a sonic screwdriver._

ELEVEN:

Get me out of the Pandorica.

RORY:

But you're not in the Pandorica.

ELEVEN:

Yes I am, well yes I was, it's complicated but I won't explain it now because-

_He runs offstage. The fez falls to the ground._

FANGIRL:

Then he disappeared into a hazy fuzz.

That man, I can't explain why he does the things he does.

_Rory carries Amy and the fez over to the Pandorica and opens it. Eleven comes out._

FANGIRL and FANBOY:

Oh my god, I don't have a clue

These paradoxes are hard to construe

My mind is blown, I bet yours is too

Well, I guess this is Doctor Who.

It's the Big Bang Two and I need to review

What on earth just happened before my eyes

Time has gone askew, the universe has too

I'll try to explain to you the big bang two

The big bang two.

_Eleven puts something on his wrist and picks up the fez, putting it on. He and Rory put Amy into the Pandorica. Rory sits down outside of it. Eleven walks over to the TARDIS._

FANBOY:

The Doctor's got River's vortex manipulator,

Which he'll use to meet Rory two thousand years later

When they find Amy after her sleep in the box.

_Amy exits the Pandorica and she and Rory head over to Eleven, who opens the TARDIS door. River comes out._

FANBOY:

They realise the sun is really the exploding TARDIS

The Doctor saves River from the imitated star

This woman, when she's back, can't help but point out the obvious…

RIVER:

Oh my God, he's wearing a fez.

RIVER, AMY:

Oh my God, he's wearing a fez.

RIVER, AMY, FANGIRL, FANBOY:

Oh my God, he's wearing a fez,

Oh my God he's wearing a fez.

_A Dalek comes out, stage right. He shoots Eleven, who collapses. Amy gasps and turns to Rory, who hugs her._

FANGIRL:

A Dalek pops up out of nowhere

Shoots the Doctor, kills him, quite unfair

He jumps back 12 minutes to the stairs

He's dead, and everyone despairs.

Little do they know, the Doctor lies.

_Eleven gets up and runs to the Pandorica. _

FANGIRL:

He's gone stopping the universe's demise.

_Amy, River, and Rory go over to the Pandorica._

FANGIRL:

Amy says her last goodbyes,

Doctor flies up into the skies

_The bench, TARDIS, and Pandorica are taken offstage throughout the next lines. Amy and Rory go stand upstage next to each other. River exits._

FANGIRL and FANBOY:

The universe is back, it's true

But the Doctor's said his final adieu

Maybe he'll come back if she remembers you…

It's the Big Bang Two,

And I need to review

What on earth just happened before my eyes

Time has been renewed, the universe has too

But Amy still can't help but cry.

There's someone missing

The question's who…

Then she remembers

Something old, something new

Something borrowed, something blue…

_The TARDIS appears. Eleven steps out._

FANBOY and FANGIRL:

And that's the Big Bang Two!

I hope it didn't confuse you…

_Blackout._


	17. The Sound of Drums

**Scene 8**

_Lights up. The stage is empty. The MASTER walks in calmly from stage left. TEN runs in after him and stops and stares, shocked. _

MASTER:

Can you hear them? They're coming…

They're in the signal, they're in my head.

_Ten slowly starts walking toward him._

MASTER:

Is it only me?

Am I the only one to be called?

This pounding in my ears is calling me to rule the world.

Rule the universe as the master of your fate

Can you hear the drums?

Don't try to fight them, it's too late.

_A projection of the Untempered Schism appears behind him. The YOUNG MASTER comes out and stares into it. _

MASTER:

Each Time Lord child

Approaches the Eye

Forced to behold the Vortex

To be inspired or run

But as I gazed into the vastness of time

I heard the sound of drums!

_The young Master leaves and the projection of the Untempered Schism disappears. Guards, played by FANBOYS, drag out MARTHA and JACK. LUCY SAXON follows them. _

MASTER:

Can you hear them? They're coming…

They're in the signal, they're in my head

_Martha runs offstage._

MASTER:

Can you hear them? They're coming…

They're in the signal, they're in my head.

_Martha returns. The guards release Jack and leave. Lucy pulls out a gun and shoots the Master. He falls to the ground and Ten runs to his side._

MASTER:

In professor's guise,

Oh Doctor, Doctor, you have healed me.

You are not alone

It took you far too long to see me.

Now I lay in your arms,

Mortally wounded in your care.

I'll leave you here forever,

Last of the Time Lords once again.

TEN:

Don't leave me now,

Think of all we've done together.

Think of all the vanquished foes.

Think of all that we could do.

MASTER:

It would be hell for me,

Imprisoned here forever

With you!

TEN: Don't, please, you've got to, please, we're the only ones left, please, just…

REGENERATE!

_Everyone but Ten and the Master leaves. _

MASTER:

_(overlapping)_ Can you hear them?

They're coming

They're in the signal

They're in my head

Can you hear them?

They're coming

They're in the signal

They're in my head.

TEN:

_(overlapping)_ In his dreams they called him

And every waking moment

He heard the Vortex calling

He heard the sound of drums

He heard the sound

The sound of drums…

_Ten leaves the Master lying on the ground and exits stage left. Blackout._


	18. Silence and the End of All Things

**Scene 9**

_A few bars from Big Bang Two play. Lights up. Amy's bedroom. The crack on the wall glows white. ELEVEN carries LITTLE AMELIA in and puts her down on the bed. He sits on the edge of the bed._

ELEVEN:

It's funny

I thought if you could hear me I could hang on somehow

Silly me…

You waited,

You waited for twelve years and now you're leaving me.

When you wake up, you'll have a mum and dad,  
but I'll be just a story.  
That's ok, we're all stories in the end,  
so live well and love Rory.

Silly old Doctor,  
A daft old man who stole a box and ran away.  
In your dreams, I'll still be there with all the days that never came.

That box is new and ancient  
Big and little at the same time, it won't leave you.  
And the times we would've had,  
Now never had inside that box of bluest blue.

The cracks are closing.  
But they won't stop 'til I am on the other side.

_He stands._

ELEVEN:  
Bye bye, Pond.  
I think I'll skip the rest of the rewind.

I don't belong here anymore,  
You know I hate repeats.  
Amelia, the girl who waited,  
No longer will you wait for me.

_The lights glow blindingly bright white for a moment. When they come back down, Eleven is gone. Amelia sits up and looks around. Blackout._


	19. The Doctor is Dying and Still Not Ginger

**Scene 10**

_Lights up. TEN enters from stage right and stands centre stage. An OOD enters stage left._

OOD:

It is returning through the dark,

Doctor, you have met your mark.

Your song is ending, so don't cry

When you hear him knock four times.

_The Ood leaves. On each beat, a FANBOY or FANGIRL enters until there are six total. They stand along the sides of the stage. _

FANBOY 1:

You're going to regenerate,

Some new man saunters away.

FANGIRL 1:

No time for games, tonight we fight

For the fate of all mankind.

TEN:

I could do so much more!

FANBOYS and FANGIRLS:

_(staring straight ahead, emotionless)_ The Time Lords returning

The Earth will be burning

The last white point star is a trap for the Master.

_(quickly turning their heads toward Ten) _The Doctor is dying, the Doctor is dying

The Doctor is dying, the Doctor is dying.

TEN:

I don't want to go.

I don't want to go.

_WILFRED comes out and hands Ten a gun._

FANBOY 2:

Wilfred will be by your side,

You will always save his life

FANGIRL 2:

Hold on now, not long to wait

'Til they bring back Gallifrey

_RASSILON steps out stage right, the MASTER stage left. Throughout the next lines, Ten looks back and forth between them, pointing the gun, and finally shoots it straight ahead. The Master and Rassilon both leave._

FANBOYS and FANGIRLS:

I'll sing you to your sleep!

The Time Lords returning

The Earth will be burning

The last white point star is a trap for the Master.

The Doctor is dying, the Doctor is dying

The Doctor is dying, the Doctor is dying…

TEN:

I don't want to go.

I don't want to go.

_He closes his eyes._

FANGIRL 3:

Just one more thing before you fall,

You'll be getting your reward.

FANBOYS and FANGIRLS:

Back in time for those you know

_(those named step onstage and go to comfort Ten)_ Donna, Martha, Jack, and Rose.

TEN:

_(quietly)_ The Time Lords returning

The Earth will be burning

The last white point star is a trap for the Master.

_He opens his eyes. Donna, Martha, Jack, and Rose leave._

FANBOYS and FANGIRLS:

The Time Lords returning

The Earth will be burning

The last white point star is a trap for the Master.

The Doctor is dying, the Doctor is dying

The Doctor is dying, the Doctor is dying!

TEN:

I don't want to go.

I don't want to go.

ALL:

REGENERATE!

_Ten collapses._

FANBOYS and FANGIRLS:

The Time Lords returning

The Earth will be burning

The last white point star is a trap for the Master

The Doctor is dying, the Doctor is dying

The Doctor is dying the Doctor is dying!

_They leave. Momentary blackout. When the lights come back up, Ten has been replaced by ELEVEN._

ELEVEN:

New teeth, that's weird.

Give me a minute, get my mouth in gear.

Just wanna check that everything still works.

Legs! Still got legs.

And there's life in this old horse yet.

And I know there's gonna be an awful lot of running to do.

_(spoken)_ Geronimo!

Head, shoulders, knees, and toes

Don't talk about that nose.

And what a chin,

I think that's everything, I'm good as new…

_(frustrated)_ But still not ginger.

New mouth, new rules.

Brand new me, but I'm no fool

I've gotta get some food inside me, I'm still cooking.

_YOUNG AMELIA comes out with a plate holding an apple, beans, and fish fingers and mustard._

ELEVEN:

_(grabbing the apple) _Apples! No, apples are rubbish. _(tosses the apple over his shoulder)_

I hate apples, let's try something Scottish.

Fried, but not evil beans.

_(glaring)_ Are you trying to make a zombie of me?

Now what's this, fish fingers and mustard?

I gotta feeling it'd be better with custard.

_A FANBOY enters, staying by the edge of the stage._

FANBOY: The worst part is that it's actually kind of tasty…

TEN (offstage): _(after a pause)_ Allons-y.

ELEVEN:

Head, shoulders, knees and toes

Don't think about that nose

And what a chin,

I think that's everything, I'm good as new…

But still not ginger.

_Blackout._

* * *

One chapter left!


	20. Finale

As I mentioned at the beginning, I edited together a fairly terrible Finale song. If you want to listen to it, the link is tinyurl ccdwmfinale (This website hates links, so add a dot-com in the space.) It has the instrumental Eleven as a background and pieces of a few of the other songs for the lyrics.

* * *

**Scene 11**

_Lights up. NINE, TEN, ELEVEN, ROSE, MARTHA, JACK, DONNA, AMY, RORY, and RIVER stand onstage in a line across the front of the stage. The Doctors are in the middle with the companions surrounding them. _

TEN:

I've ended lives and ended worlds

I guess I've done it all

ELEVEN:

Fire and ice and rage inside, how long 'til I fall?

ROSE, MARTHA, JACK, DONNA, AMY, RORY, RIVER:

_(overlapping)_ The travelling man will save the day.

NINE:

But you can't exterminate me!

NINE, TEN, ELEVEN:

Regenerate me!

ROSE, MARTHA, JACK, DONNA, AMY, RORY, RIVER:

_(overlapping)_ The travelling man will keep you safe.

TEN:

_(overlapping)_ I used to be old, but now I feel young,

Cause I was a boy when I learnt how to run.

NINE:

I could never be settled in one time or place.

ELEVEN:

_(overlapping)_ Somewhere all my darkest fears are gathering…

ALL:

I won't ever stop, cause I know what's right.

Get in my way, I will burst into light.

I keep dying and living, changing my ways…

ROSE: Who are you?

NINE, TEN, ELEVEN: I'm the Doctor.

_A growl comes from behind. Everyone turns to face the danger. Curtain falls._


End file.
